You are such a clever martyr!
Though some might rather call you suicide
You love like a shrike
You like to "trick-or-treat" for your love
And "comparison shop" to get the best deal
You have no idea how transparent you are
As you float through life like a jelly-fish

You distracted me from my serenity
To torture me with your conditional love.
As the clouds rolled by and the river ran past
And the tomatoes rotted on my window sill
To stink like some undefined soured fish
You could smell when you opened the kitchen door

And you left me to sit and stare at the phone in my hands
Thinking I could will it to ring just to hear your sweet voice -
But you never really called me again
Except to patronize and pacify me like you were doing me the favor
Please send me the bill so I am not obligated
You told me there was no price to pay
For those moments of happiness I stole

Manipulating me with my own guilt for having loved you
Never offering me the slightest comfort for my sorrow
Your being oblivious to my sadness and hurt
The stale smell of the sunlight through the dust on my venetian blinds
In exchange for the scent of your breath
Your absence from me buzzing in the silence you left
The dripping of the kitchen faucet like a water torture
As I lay on the couch and see your smile when I close my eyes
All small tortures as I am burning in my Purgatory

2000 poetheart

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